when men are like “I don’t need to do anything around the house because my job is to protect my family” what are you protecting them from??? wolves?????

when men are like “I don’t need to do anything around the house because my job is to protect my family” what are you protecting them from??? wolves?????
house MD voice: if it’s in his lungs, it’s in his asshole. get me a biopsy of his penis.
Setting up two gofundmes at the same time one for top surgery and one for breast implants and im gonna get the surgery that gets its goal funded first. #teamflats vs #teambigunnaturals
so you know how the first use of mansplain was on a spn livejournal comment
If you fall for a social media prank, do you reblog/pass it on to your followers?
happy hallowing you can take TWO pieces
I had to take a piss test for a job I got hired at today, and this is the name of the fuckin company that makes the tests
“i cant wait to get home from work so i can do all that stuff i wanted to do”
when i get home from work:
Guy about to invent sparkling water: water is so good but I wish that it tasted terrible and hated me
IMPORTANT
fun fact: any policy on drugs that isn’t harm reduction is going to cause addicts to suffer and die
fun fact: Drug addiction is a public health issue, and approaching it as if it were a law enforcement issue is prejudicial to addicts and will result in their suffering and death
if you just assume addiction is a method of self-medicating, you’ll pretty much never be wrong.
now, not everything people self-medicate for actually has a proper treatment. i’m pretty sure the reason my uncle made sure to be slightly drunk at all times ‘to round the sharp corners off of things’ was sensory processing disorder. i have that too, and i just kind of accept that i’m going to randomly get my brain sandpapered from time to time. there is no medication for that. all you can do is dull your senses. i’ve chosen not to, but i can’t blame him for his decisions. when a ringing phone feels like getting hit upside the head with a frying pan, liver damage sounds like a fair price to pay.
anyway, it seems really self-evident to me that people don’t enjoy living the life of an addict, they do it because the alternative looks worse. people don’t get addicted to substances just for funsies. they start making a habit of taking something because of insomnia, or grief, or headaches, or depression, or seething undirected rage and terror they can’t put a name to – something that they can’t ignore or shrug off. and for whatever reason – lack of access, lack of knowlege, lack of money, or it just plain doesn’t exist – they aren’t able to apply the Approved Correct Remedy. they use what they can get.
addicts aren’t some weird otherfolk who inexplicably just Do Drugs because they’re Bad. addicts are you with a problem you can’t solve.
these facts aren’t fun but they are pretty important
Even funner fact: the entire public health field has been full throat screaming all of this for decades, and yet law enforcement priorities have clotheslined change at every turn.
im just laying down but NOT for a nap guys i swear im getting comfy cozy but im NOT GOING TO FALL ASLEEP my ass is NOT laying my head to rest bro im just getting snug as a bug in a rug. FOR NO REASON. ill be awake the whole time bro i swear. me and my stuffed animals are just hanging out dude i PROMISE ill be awake im not sle
my grubhub being delivered by a wizard or some sort of apostle